Looking Death in the Eye

Written by Carl Ellsworth
Directed by Garth Maxwell

Not since Maternal Instincts has an episode had me perched on the edge of my seat, wishing I had a time machine so I could jump ahead to see what happens next. None of the season-ending cliffhangers have that distinction. Maternal Instincts did it first, and this episode had me tearing my hair out and bouncing off the walls. Why?

Because I knew what was going on all along -- well, almost. I must admit that despite the expectation of Xena's pulling off yet another master plan, I got caught up in the story and some aspects caught me completely off guard. But I'll get to that in a moment.

Xena is a master. Once again, she pulls the baby switch on the Olympians, and once again they fall for it. At this rate, they deserve to be put out of their misery. But I'm rambling... let's start at the beginning...

It looks like Gabrielle is back in the writing groove. In fact, it seems she left quite a legacy behind. "The final scroll of the Bard of Potidea" indeed! The legend of Xena and Gabs seems to have done nothing but grow in the intervening years, to the point where claims of knowing the Warrior Princess are met with ridicule -- even when delivered by Joxer himself. I think it is a shame that we don't really know what became of the lug in the intervening years.

Well that's not entirely true -- we know he married Meg (heard but not seen in this episode), and they have two children.

Speaking of which, it is never really made clear just how far forward we have jumped. Unofficial reports give a 25-year interlude. That would seem to jive with the old age make-up Ted Raimi is sporting (not a bad job, by the way). But if it is that long, why do Joxer's kids look like they're only about ten or eleven? Did it really take him that long to settle down? So there's one niggling little question.

Another is, why is Joxer all hepped up about the Scroll? If he was there at the end and had Octavius explain everything to him, why was he acting as though he didn't know what was going on? He suggested to Meg that the scroll might contain some answers, but he already had them, didn't he? Don't get me wrong, I fully understand his desire to possess the last known earthly remnant of his lost love. It makes perfect sense. I also understand the need to read the scroll to his kids. That works.

But the transition, and the mentions that maybe it contains some answers... well, I'll just have to presume that he thought it might contain more information than he already knew, and then learned that it didn't.

It felt to me like everything had been working up to this episode. Anybody who had tuned in for this episode as their first taste of Xena would have been lost. There are more references to earlier events in this script than there are in a clip show. And Ellsworth keeps most of his facts straight. He seems to know his Xenaverse -- or at least took the time to research it (which is more than can be said of some other script writers the show has been graced with).

The plot is nothing especially surprising, if you think about it. The Olympians are after Xena and Eve, Xena buys time and eventually fakes everybody out with a brilliant ruse that fools everybody who didn't know.

That's where the trouble starts. Xena is given a prophecy by the Fates -- "Only in the essence of death" can the Twilight come to pass. So she sets right to work writing her own fate.

The funny thing about prophecy is, it seldom turns out the way you expect.

Thus is born an elaborate ruse to convince the Olympians that Xena, Gabrielle, and Eve are dead -- removing the threat of the Twilight. Capture Death -- in an homage to Death in Chains -- take her tears, and drink them, which puts Xena and Gabrielle into a coma that looks a lot like they're off to whatever afterlife the show has decided to embrace this week.

Of course, one advantage to the royal flush of dead-lands the show has visited is the Olympians won't know where to look for them in the afterlife. There's a lot of territory out there, and only a small piece of it is under Hades's control.

I bought Xena's argument with Celesta about how death started the suffering for those left behind. Having seen what she had done in the past for those she loved, I believed that she would be willing to put an end to death in order to assure Eve's life.

In other words, I believed exactly what Xena (and Gabrielle) wanted me to believe.

And yet, as the wagon plummeted from the sea cliffs, I knew Eve wasn't on board. When Xena looked up at the Olympians and ran to the burning wreckage of the wagon I knew there was some detail I had overlooked, and that all would turn out all right eventually.

Xena knew Ares would show up to stop her from stabbing herself. She knows he loves her, even if he can't say it to her face. Indeed, it is a key part of her plan.

In the end, her trick works too well. Ares, in a wonderful display of chivalry and honor, takes the two to an icy cave, where he entombs them side by side in icy coffins. (Did anybody else get Snow White flashbacks, by the way?) How many warlords can claim the honor of Ares himself sealing their tomb? Does anybody doubt the War God's feelings for this woman?

The sequence in the cave, where Ares gives what he presumes is his final farewell, is easily one of the ten best moments of the series (at least in my not-so-humble opinion). "When you sacrificed yourself for others, you were hers. But when you kicked ass, you were mine." (Or something like that.) Even writing about it now, I get all choked up.

I felt like one of the kids at Joxer's knee, listening to the tale. When the "Executive Producer" credits appeared, I had so many questions -- what happened to Eve? How did Xena and Gabrielle escape their icy prison?

In summary, the minor plot inconsistencies (which always show up if you're looking for them) make little difference. The plot itself is rather pedestrian -- Xena outwits the Olympians once again with a clever ruse. Yet the tale is riveting. I did not notice the foibles until my brain had gotten over the rapturous joy it felt upon consumption of this wondrous repast. This episode ranks as one of my all time favorite eps -- not the best, but certainly deserving comparison to Maternal Instincts.

It may sound a bit rude, but this episode kicks ass. I hadn't lost myself in an episode since Maternal Instincts (when I was first hooked on the show). The Powers That Be were able to pull it off a second time, lor' bless 'em. If this episode doesn't restore your faith in the magic of the series, I would go so far as to say that you just don't get it. (Let me qualify that by saying you don't get it the way I do.)

I feel like I've gushed unceasingly and not really said anything important, or deep, or philosophical, or anything.

So what?

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